Bigfoot Pornography Becomes Epidemic on the Internet

In an unexpected move today officials from the FBI in coordination with the Forestry Service announced plans to begin 'sting' operations against websites showing Bigfoot pornography. These disturbing sites often feature "nature shots" of the semi-mythical creature engaging in sexual acts in the wild.
"It's sickening," stated Bob Sturgis of the US Forestry Service, "these people have got real problems! We have enough trouble trying to protect Bigfoot from hunters and crazies without trying to weed out everyone with a video camera and a poorly written script!"
"It was time to act," agreed Mark Tool, the senior FBI agent on the case.
"I'm not sure how they do things in other countries, but I know no one in the United States is going to stand for pornography on the internet."
According to sources in the adult film industry, problems for the 'wood ape' began with speculation about the relationship of the creature's 'big feet' with it's other anatomical features. It wasn't long before the Blue Grotto Motion Picture Company out of Las Vegas sent a team into the pacific northwest to make "Feet of Thunder", the first in what would become a series of Bigfoot adult movies and pictorials.
Soon a cottage industry sprang up on the internet, trading in both authorized and illicit Bigfoot pornographic material. Currently, to make Bigfoot porn, a permit from the Forestry Service is required in advance. It is estimated, however, that up to eighty percent of the Bigfoot pornography on the web was filmed and photographed without such a permit.
"It's just so damn easy," noted a source on condition of anonymonity, "they don't even understand the concept of money! We pay them in acorns for God's sake!"
Federal officials hope that this crackdown will help them segue into other enforcement efforts, most notably a joint operation with Scotland Yard to end the so-called "Night with Nessie" sites. We will keep you apprised of developments.